Deadline, Schmedline. I’m Making Pie. RECIPE: Vegan Raspberry Lemonade Glacé Pie

Determined, I pushed my cart through the aisles of the grocery store, on a mission. Two tubs of vegan cream cheese, a bag of vegan sugar and some raspberries stood in the way of my night of baking.

What did you just ask? Sugar isn’t vegan?

Most of the white stuff that passes for sugar isn’t vegan. Most granulated white cane sugar in the United States is refined with bone char, a granular material made—appropriately enough—by charring animal bones.

Much like me, my sweetener is unrefined. I use evaporated cane juice crystals in place of white sugar and brown sugar (most of which is actually white sugar, with molasses added back in), and I don’t adjust the measure. I simply substitute teaspoon for teaspoon, cup for cup.

I didn’t want to spend a lot of time in the grocery. I’d had a busy, exhausting day which began with a dramatic scene, starring Curlytop and Snugglebug, with spotlights on dueling tantrums over which would get the last elephant-shaped vitamin, and which would be left with the stupid tiger. As is our schedule this summer, I herded them onto the patio so they could be in the pool before 8:30 a.m. and splashing my netbook as I work on the cookbook I’m co-authoring with international bestselling author William Maltese.

Did I mention I’m way behind schedule on my part of the book?

Shortly after I signed the glowing, heralded publishing contract, I took on yet another job — as a sexual health consultant and distributor of “bedroom accessories.” I don’t mean knickknacks to put on your nightstand; more like things to knock your knickers off.

Kids, cookbook, column, adult toy sales... This is every mother’s to-do list, right?

In addition to forming a new business, I lost over a month of kitchen time when we moved, mostly because my brain turned to gelatin (also not vegan) as a feeble defense mechanism in response to the stress involved in moving a household of nine people, three dogs, a cat, and a hundred-gallon fish tank with an unknown number of fish.

A mama can’t cook a decent meal, let alone create new recipes, with a brain of gelatin.

I’d spent the hours before my grocery run obsessing over my looming cookbook deadline, typing up proven recipes, playing lifeguard to the water-babies, and obsessing over my looming cookbook deadline.

Did I mention I was obsessing?

Not until I was away from my keyboard, children, husband and kitchen—and into the crowded grocery—did I realize I’d missed another, more immediate, deadline: the one for my Gonzo Mama column.

I hadn’t missed it by much. Not really. Well, maybe a bit more than usual. Okay, I was over nine hours late when I texted Mr. Editor, explaining my presence at the grocery store, and my preoccupation with what I imagined would be the greatest thing to ever come out of my oven. Or maybe the greatest since last week’s cheesecake.

Somehow, I don’t think he was impressed.

Mr. Editor either isn’t allowed to eat pie, or he has steel-plated willpower, because I never see him eat anything sweet. Dear readers, you may be impressed, however. Here’s the recipe:

Vegan Raspberry Lemonade Glacé Pie



You’ll need:
1 pre-formed 9-inch pie crust (not pre-baked) (Or use my perfect pie crust recipe.)

Filling:
2 – 8oz. tubs vegan cream cheese, like Tofutti Better Than Cream Cheese
1 cup evaporated cane juice crystals or raw sugar
1 1/2 teaspoons vanilla
1/4 cup lemon juice
2 tablespoons cornstarch

Topping:
1/2 cup evaporated cane juice crystals or raw sugar
1 tablespoon cornstarch
1/2 cup water
1 cup chopped fresh or frozen raspberries, thawed
1/2 cup whole fresh or frozen raspberries, thawed

Preheat oven to 350 degrees.

Combine filling ingredients in a blender or food processor. Pour into pie shell and bake 45-50 minutes, or until top just begins to take on a golden hue, and the crust begins to brown.

Place baked pie on a cooling rack and allow to cool.

Prepare topping by combining cane juice crystals or sugar with cornstarch in a medium saucepan. Gradually stir in water and chopped raspberries and cook over medium heat, stirring constantly, until mixture begins to thicken. Bring to a boil and boil for one full minute while continuing to stir constantly to prevent burning. Remove from heat.

Place whole raspberries evenly over top of pie (it's okay if a few break), then pour raspberry sauce over entire top of pie, spreading evenly.

Refrigerate pie for four hours before serving—if you can wait that long—and enjoy!

I did mention the cookbook is not intended as a weight-loss guide, right?


"Like" The Gonzo Mama on Facebook, and don't forget to see what's cooking with Sexy Vegan Mama today!

Sexy Vegan Mama: No-Tofu Pumpkin Pie

Around October of each year, I begin developing a strong, intense craving for pumpkin pie, and it doesn't subside until I break down and actually buy silken tofu (which I rarely use) sometime in November and find a recipe for pumpkin pie. This year, I was determined to find a recipe that didn't call for the slimy, squishy soy stuff. I found this one at Vegweb.com, but I wasn't crazy about the flax seed and wheat germ crust, so I used my tried-and-true Sexy Vegan Mama's Perfect Pie Crust. Also, I used spiced pumpkin pie filling instead of pumpkin and pumpkin pie spice, and made a few other modifications.

Here's the recipe as I modified it:

Sexy Vegan Mama's No-Tofu Pumpkin Pie

You’ll need:

1 – 9” pie pan
1 pie crust (I used my recipe)

Ingredients:

1 t. lemon juice
1 c. vanilla soy milk

1/4 c. unbleached white flour
1/4 c. oil
3/4 c. evaporated cane juice crystals or vegan sugar
1/4 t. salt
1 – 15 oz. can pumpkin pie filling
1 t. molasses

Directions:

Preheat oven 450 degrees.

In a small bowl, combine lemon juice and soy milk. Allow to curdle.

While waiting for the liquid to curdle, mix flour and oil into a paste, then mix in sugar and salt, blending thoroughly. Stir in pumpkin pie filling and molasses.

Add curdled soy milk and stir until smooth.

Pour into pie shell and bake for 15 minutes at 450 degrees, then turn oven down to 350 degrees and bake for 40 to 50 minutes longer. The pie filling may be bubbling… be careful taking it out of the oven.

Let the pie cool thoroughly before serving. It’s even better if you put it in the refrigerator to chill before serving.

Sexy Vegan Mama: Deep-Dish French Apple Pie

Ah... Apple pie. Whether you make it with a traditional full-top crust, a lattice-top crust, or a French top, it's a perfect, tasty way to pack a few cubic feet of cellulite on your butt. My family likes a French topping, so that's the recipe I'll share with you.

First, if you haven't already, head on over to learn how to make my Sexy Vegan Mama's Perfect Pie Crust.




Sexy Vegan Mama's Deep-Dish French Apple Pie

You'll need:

A 9.5" deep-dish pie pan
A single pie crust (See my recipe)

Ingredients:

5 to 7 large (or 10 to 12 medium) Granny Smith apples, peeled and sliced (you'll need about 12 cups after slicing)

1 1/2 c. evaporated cane juice crystals or vegan sugar
1/2 c. unbleached white flour
1 t. ground nutmeg
1 t. ground cinnamon

Topping:

1 c. unbleached white flour
1/2 c. evaporated cane juice crystals or vegan sugar
1 stick vegan margarine

Directions:

Preheat oven to 425 degrees.

Combine sugar, flour, nutmeg and cinnamon, then stir into apple slices. Transfer sliced apples into prepared pie crust (the apples should form a small mountain - they cook down a lot when baking!).

You can add a few dollops of vegan margarine if you like it extra-buttery.

Prepare topping by combining flour and sugar, then cutting in margarine until crumbly.

Spread topping evenly over apples in pie shell. Bake 35 minutes, then cover entire top with foil and bake another 10 to 15 minutes.

This pie rocks served warm! The experts say so:

Sexy Vegan Mama: Perfect Pie Crust

It's a learned skill, making the perfect pie crust, but it's really the key to making perfect pie. I learned the basics by watching my mom in her kitchen, and developed my vegan baking skills later as a young adult, working in her bakery. It's not as hard as you might think to turn out a flaky, tasty crust without using butter. Check it out:






Sexy Vegan Mama’s Perfect Pie Crust
(makes two 10-inch pie crusts)

Ingredients:

1 cup vegan stick margarine (I use Nucoa)
2 2/3 c. unbleached white flour
1 t. salt
7 to 8 T. cold water

In a large mixing bowl, combine four and salt. Cut margarine into flour mixture using a fork or pastry blender. Knobby little pieces will form, and you want them about the size of petite peas.

Add water, one tablespoon at a time, tossing with a fork until all the dough is moistened and sticks to itself more than it does the bowl. It may take more or less water than the recipe calls for.

Roll the dough into a ball and remove it from the bowl. Divide the ball in half, forming two balls, then flatten on a flour-covered cutting board. Use a floured rolling pin on each flattened round to spread the dough into a 12” circle (13-14” for deep-dish pans).

To transfer the crust into the pie pan, fold it carefully in fourths, place it in the bottom of the pan, then gently unfold it. Using a knife or scissors, trim the crust to about a half-inch around the edge of the pan.

 Use your fingers to tuck the excess edges under.

Using your thumb and forefingers, gently pinch the thick edge of the crust all the way around the rim of the pan, creating a fluted edge.

Use a fork to prick the bottom and sides of the crust to prevent puffing while it’s baking.

If you are pre-baking your crust: Bake for 8 to 10 minutes in an oven preheated to 475 degrees.

If you are only making one pie: Seal the unused, unbaked crust in plastic wrap or a large zipper bag and put it in the freezer. It will keep up to three months if well-sealed. Let it thaw completely before baking.