Pillow Talk With The Gonzo Mama: It's Hot. I Know.

What do the parents of seven children talk about in bed?

You wouldn't believe me, if I told you.

Take last night for example. Instead of falling promptly asleep, I was seized by a fit of giggles.

Mr. Wright: What's so funny?

Me: I was just thinking how bad it would suck if a person were a werewolf or werecat and allergic to herself or himself.

Mr. Wright: Yeah... Can you imagine waking up with hives after every full moon?

Me: What if you were a sucky kind of were? Like a weresheep? What would be cool about being a weresheep? I mean, they're not fierce or anything. A wereturtle? I can understand that. That might be cool in a battle; you could just tuck yourself up in your little wereshell and be safe. But a sheep?

Mr. Wright: Oh, it's a full moon! Hide the oats! Here comes that crazy weresheep... He's outta control! Get the pitchforks... and start pitching the hay somewhere safe!

Me: What if you were a wereslug? And you had to always worry about people chasing after you with a salt shaker? I mean, how bad would it suck to be a wereslug? Or what if you were a werebarnacle, and you attached yourself to a cargo ship during the full moon, and when you changed back, you were under a ship in Singapore? That would suck.

Mr. Wright: Yeah...

Me: Yeah.

Maybe tonight we'll discuss how bad it would suck to be a vegan and turned into a vampire. Is it any wonder we have seven kids?

I think not.

Photo credits:

http://www.flickr.com/photos/leomiranda/ / CC BY-NC-ND 2.0

http://www.flickr.com/photos/70267096@N00/ / CC BY-NC-SA 2.0